I just can’t…
Just found out that one of my family members is dying and. Another one might end up dying so now I just want to cry. I hate how I say no one liked me but cousin claude always did even thoigh I only saw him twice and the first time I thought he was weird but the second time I thought he was so nice and he favored me because he always said youre my girl and now he mighy die.
Keep your head up and think about the good times you had with them and everything will work out. :-)Source: hotm3ss
1. There will be several days that you daydream about stepping in front of a city bus. Don’t. It will not be beautiful. It will not be brave. It will be selfish. It will be broken. Your mother will cry.
2. Don’t write for him. Write for you. Write for others like you. Write so the girl that thinks about stepping in front of public transportation doesn’t. Don’t be selfish.
3. When you will yourself to sleep and it doesn’t come- get up. It doesn’t matter that it’s 3 am. There will be other 3 am’s. Take a shower. Take two. Wash him out of your hair. Write a poem. Read the same book you’ve read 202 times again. The 203rd time might tell you something different. Don’t stay in bed- you will think about the bus again.
4. Don’t kiss him because he’s broken. Don’t kiss him because his laughter never reaches his eyes. Don’t try and fix him. Fix yourself first. Be selfish. He can’t save you.
5. Date yourself. Take yourself out to eat. Don’t share your popcorn at the movies with anyone. Stroll around an art museum alone. Fall in love with canvases. Fall in love with yourself.
6. Dress up and wear red lipstick and get drunk with your friends. They’re the ones that will pick you up. Don’t kiss him. Or him. Don’t fall asleep on strange couches with strange boys. When his hand slides up your dress walk away. Hit him. Don’t kiss him. He can’t save you.
7. Get another tattoo. Get five more. Get another hole in your ear. Don’t listen to your dad. You will still be able to get a job. Did you really want to be employed by someone like your father? Haven’t you had enough of judgmental old white men anyway? Get fuck you tattooed in tiny letters on your hip.
8. When you feel the yearning for a new city- start over. Take 200 bucks and a three suitcases. Work anywhere that will have you. Meet strange people and forget your name. Call yourself Ruby. No one will know the difference. Remember to call your mother. Don’t be selfish. Come home when you find yourself in the strangers and the small one bedroom apartment.
9. Don’t whisper evil things into your own ear. Other people are going to shout them at you. Be your own hero. Keep a sword on your key ring.
10. Don’t step in front of a city bus. It will not be beautiful. Live. Stay up all night with a boy that promises you everything and means it. Live. See shitty local bands with a friend. Wear a different band’s t-shirt. No one will care. Live. Have a baby girl with tiny fingers and tiny toes someday. Pour love into her until it’s overflowing. Live. Wake up. Staying in bed all day is not poetic.
Do you hear that? It’s me. It’s your life. Wake up."
This is 19 year old Marie Fowler. Her cancer just returned, and has been declared terminal. She’s already in Hospice Care. Her final wish is to meet Kellin Quinn from Sleeping With Sirens. Please, make it happen. Spread the word. This girl deserves it.
The small amount of notes on this post worries me.
SIGNAL BOOST. LET’S MAKE THIS HAPPEN.
COME ON GUYS, IF WE CAN GET A FLUFFY CHICKEN FOR SOMEONE WHY NOT THIS
REBLOG THIS OR ELSE
imagine it’s you
imagine it’s you or someone you love
COME ON PEOPLE
Honestly last night was super fun and memorable. I didn’t wanna go but I pushed myself. So my track team was going to cici’s and then we were gonna go to the the movies to see Catching Fire after. I was a little ansy about it because i’m not super social but I asked a friend to help me make a decision and she did :) and I was a rebel and did something I shouldn’t have done and I actually could’ve gotten in big trouble with but i’m glad I did it so yeah it was amazingggg
What did you do???Source: hotm3ss
Just another day in the life of Carleen full of blood, sweat and tears. I don’t get it. First I get made fun of again at school and then I get so mad that I snap at someone and then I come home to the unsupporting family who doesn’t care and it’s funny how the minute I walked in, I got yelled at….
Screw those people! You deserve so much more than you get and you are gorgeous!!!Source: hotm3ss
To all the haters that made me feel bad about myself today i’d like to thank you for showing me some of my insecurities and making me feel dumb. I’d like to thank you for making me make the dumb idea of taking 1hour out of my day to straighten my hair which I knew wouldnt stay straight in time for tommorow. I’d like to thank you for making me feel so bad about myself even more than I already do thanks to my horrible week already. I’d like to thank you for making sure I was always behind or below you and you were always above me. I’d like to share my fake smiles with you to show you that, thats all I have. I’d like to show you my “normal face” the one everyone. Thinks of as my sad face. I’d like to hide from you forever so I wouldnt have to do these things but I cant so I guess I have no choice now.
You are amazing!!! and who ever made you feel like this is a horrible horrible person!!!!Source: hotm3ss